Monday, 9 June 2014

Coping Techniques For a More Relaxed State of Mind

I read a really insightful blog post a few days ago. It was a bit of an eyeopener and has since given me a deeper insight into myself, and into things I hadn't considered before and had always tried to change about me.

That blog post was 15 tips for the highly sensitive parent from sortacrunchy.net. You need to go and read this post and see if any of it applies to you, I think for everyone there will be some small thing they can take away from it to enhance their coping abilities at the very least.

I thought I should share some of the things that make me feel better. I realized I am a highly sensitive person in many ways and to get the most from life the only person I can expect to change is myself, because even though my problem is with the external world, its internally that this information is processed and I can change how this affects me!

I took this short test by Dr. Elaine Aron, and got 16 out of the 27 checks to see if you are a highly sensitive person. From the rest of Megan Zietz post I began to take note of the coping techniques that work for me.

So, since that short time has passed that I first read the post I've had a bit of a time trying to make the changes to my life to make things more harmonious. I think nesting might also have something to do with it too!

I gutted my outside patio space where Martin has been parking his motorbike, his tools, and loads of recycling and the rubbish bins. I did that on Friday afternoon, and set up our BBQ, table and chairs so we can now enjoy the space like our outdoor living room which I have always had in every house I've lived in. Not having that here has made me feel rather cooped up though I still need to get a fence up to feel truly private.


Eva enjoying bbq'd food


Martin getting his grill on

Over the last few days the inside of my house has received a similar treatment, and I feel so much more free and relaxed. There is so much more SPACE in the house and outside. I planted up my hydrangeas and moved some other pots so I can see them from my kitchen window. Also I moved my herbs to the table right under my kitchen window, A for the scent and B so the slugs don't eat them!

Here are a few of my coping mechanisms that I felt compelled to write down as soon as I had read Megan's post.

My Coping Mechanisms

1. Nature - I love it, I didn't realise before how much I had brought nature into my home already but its there in a big way, from my leaf print living room curtains to my rainforest mural in my bedroom, and I re-appreciated what I have and enhanced it further.

2. Relaxing smells - namely Ylang Ylang and Lavender, I got my oil burner on straight away and used a few drops of my favourite scents to make me feel instantly more relaxed.

3. Privacy outside - I enjoy being outside in my garden so much but since moving a year ago haven't gotten round to ensuring all and sundry can't see in. That's changing now come July, thank you understand fiancee of mine. :)

4. Less whining - OK, Eva hasn't been 100% and we were all a bit run down. After a couple of days of it though I could feel my resolve waning. Generally we have creche support twice a week right now, on Monday I do aquanatal so Eva attends creche at the pool and Thursday she goes to the creche where I attend PND counselling. I've also asked my Mum to take her this coming weekend and she always says YES, I don't know why I didn't ask sooner.

5. Enough sleep - Martin put our blackout blinds underneath the curtains yesterday evening and I slept for a few solid hours thanks to that. I also set the mood, at 9pm stopped what I was doing and had a cup of tea, then up to bed at 10.30pm and enjoyed the Lavender and Ylang Ylang drops I had put on our bed sheets, almost instantly I was asleep and its the best I've enjoyed in weeks.

6. Don't overwhelm myself - Since having Eva and being a full time Mum, I like to keep our schedule filled with things to do. Over this weekend though, I cancelled several things that were getting too much.

7. Clean, tidy house - my greatest annoyance is a messy house. Thanks to this post - 'How to make your house feel clean even when you don't have much time' , that's not an issue and following these simple steps helps me feel better, and the MIL is happy when she comes too!

8. Tasty, good for the family meals - I have had a proper internal battle raging lately on what to do about cooking when the baby comes and I knew my energy levels would start to wane in my third trimester. In truth its happened sooner than the third trimester but I've come up with simple, yet effortless meals to cater to my families needs.
Bacon and Cheese Baked Potatoes and Salad
 Bacon and Cheese Baked Potatoes and Salad for example.


Please share any of your tips to make you feel better and cope with the demands of life, a problem shared is a problem halved so they say!

Eva and I enjoyed our Sunday afternoon with Granny checking out some beautiful gardens in Inveresk's garden open day.

 Spot the child?
Eva and granny